Learn to speak Pirate, courtesy of Mango Languages
How do you say: Oh my gosh, the ship isn't moving!
Answer: Blow me down, the ship's becalmed!
If this inspires you to learn other languages, like Spanish, French, Italian, Chinese, Arabic, Vietnamese, Greek and more, check out DPL's Mango Languages database (library card required) and more language resources.
Use that same Mango Languages database for native speakers of Spanish and all the languages above to learn English.
Arr, me hearty! A fine gentleman o'fortune be ye!